I'll Never Love Again
by ChoCedric
Summary: Reposted due to editing. "Cedric would want you to be strong. He's in a better place now," everyone told her, but how did they know? The place he truly belonged was here on Earth, with all his loved ones. Cedric's funeral from Cho's point of view.


Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

I'll Never Love Again

By: ChoCedric

It was a beautiful, sunny Sunday morning. As Cho Chang walked with her parents into the church for her boyfriend and the love of her life Cedric Diggory's viewing and funeral, she wondered how the sun could still shine, the sky could still be blue, and the birds could still be chirping when Cedric wasn't around anymore. Her heart was shattered into a million glass shards, and she knew she'd never see Cedric's beautiful, honest gray eyes light up again, never feel him put his arms around her again, never hear his soft, soothing voice again. This was too much for her to take. Why did her loving angel have to die?

As the somber group entered the church, Cho walked to the part where her love's body was lying. He looked just as handsome as ever in the mahogany casket, his eyes now closed and his arms at his sides. But his face ... oh, Merlin, his face! He looked just as scared and alone as he had the night his life had ended. She knew, even as he rotted in the ground, that that look would always be frozen upon his handsome visage. Tears streamed down her face as she wondered, yet again, what he'd been through in those last moments to make him look so vulnerable and afraid.

Cho put a picture of her and Cedric in his limp, lifeless hand. The picture had been taken the night before he died, and in it, his eyes sparkled with love and laughter. He was holding her close to him, whispering "I love you, my little missy," in her ear. "I will love you forever." And she had been smiling, knowing that nothing could go wrong as long as he was around. Her heart broke again as she felt how icy cold his hand now was.

I'll never be able to fall in love again, she thought miserably as she bent down to kiss her boyfriend's freezing, stiff lips. "I love you, Cedric. Forever. And I'll miss you so much," she sobbed as she stroked his boyish waves of hair for the last time. Her mother put an arm around her, and Cho knew she was doing her best to give her comfort. Her father, however, had a stony expression upon his face. He had been wary of his little girl having a boyfriend, and even now, with him lying cold and motionless in a coffin, he still didn't seem to understand that she had loved Cedric. This was such an awful, unfortunate thing to happen in his teenage daughter's life, but he was displaying a blank mask to her.

Cho didn't want to leave Cedric's side, but everyone was going to sit down, so she reluctantly gave her boyfriend's hand one last squeeze and then went to the pews. Her father handed her a tissue as more tears continued to fall down her face. The organ was playing a slow, somber song, and Cho thought, this is so unfair. Cedric had so much to live for. She knew he had been loved dearly by many, for the church was completely packed. She'd never seen so many people in a church in all her life, and she'd been going to services on Sundays for years.

Finally, the organ stopped playing, and the Minister got up to speak. Cho's heartbroken sobs mingled with others as he said, "We are gathered here today to celebrate the life of Cedric Amos Diggory, a wonderful young man who was extremely loving and giving. He touched many lives, and today you will hear accounts of how much joy he spread to all who knew him."

Cho felt that Cedric would be disappointed in her, for she hadn't prepared a speech. But truthfully, she was too heartbroken to get up there and speak about him. That would make it too final, even though she knew watching his body being lowered into the ground would make it even more final. But she just couldn't go up there and talk of the times they had shared; she probably wouldn't be able to get anything out anyway, for the tears would be falling too fast.

A hymn was sung, and Cho tried to sing as well through her sobs, but her voice kept cracking. She leaned her head on her mother's shoulder, soaking the woman's dress with tears. Mrs. Chang stroked her daughter's hair; she had never seen her vibrant, young little girl in such a state of misery. She must have really loved Cedric, she thought. She's taking this so hard.

The funeral was a blur to Cho. Many people got up to speak about Cedric and how tragic it was that his life had ended in such an unfortunate accident. Cho wanted to leap up and scream, it was murder! Why won't you admit it? When his lifeless gray eyes had stared, stared, stared at the crowd that terrible night, Cho had known immediately that the person who had taken his life had intended to take it. No accident could have made her love have that fearful and vulnerable look on his face.

Mrs. Diggory spoke at the service, and Cho marvelled at her bravery. Her husband, like Cho, was too much of an emotional wreck to speak, but Eileen Diggory spoke lovingly of her son, talking about all the things he had done in his young life. Noses were being blown and eyes were being wiped all around the church, and Cho couldn't stop her own torrent of tears. God, he was only seventeen, and I loved him! she thought, grief-stricken and angry.

After the service was over, everyone went outside for the burial. Mr. Diggory and some of Cedric's Hufflepuff friends carried the casket, which was closed now, to where the grave diggers had already dug a hole. Cho shook all over as the Minister said, "Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. May Merlin bless you, Cedric Diggory, and may you rest in peace."

A heartwrenching scream of agony left Cho's lips, and her mother held her tight as the casket was lowered into the ground. Cedric's loved ones started throwing dirt on top of the coffin, but Cho howled, "No! No! No!" when it was her turn to do so. People looked at her with sympathy, and she was told she didn't have to do it. But oh, Merlin, this was so damn final. The love of her life was never coming back. He'd never hug her again, never hold her again, never dance with her again, never fly with her again, never kiss her again. Oh God, this was too much!

Cho didn't remember much about the rest of the day. She went to the reception, where people hugged her , comforted her, and told her that Cedric would live in her heart forever. But Cho couldn't help feeling that these were just empty words; she knew that she'd never see Cedric again. She couldn't count how many times people told her that Cedric would want her to be strong, that he was in a better place now. How did they know that? She thought furiously. He belonged here, on Earth! How could there be a better place than here, with all his loved ones, with her, who had given her whole heart to him?

And she knew that in her dreams she'd always see his lifeless body on the Quidditch pitch, with people ogling him and yelling all around him, "He's dead! He's dead! He's dead! He's dead! He's dead!"

She tried to eat some food, for there was plenty there: salads and sandwiches and cookies, all the things Cedric loved. But Cedric would never eat again. How could she enjoy the pleasures of food when her boyfriend would never bite into anything again? Her parents had to beg her to put anything in her mouth, and finally, she did so, but she felt empty inside.

Before she knew it, she was saying goodbye to Cedric's mother and father. They held her close:, and Mrs. Diggory said, "My son loved you so very, very much, Cho. Please don't be sad for him, he would have wanted you to move on. Yes, remember him, Cho, but move on. He would only want the best for you."

Cho nodded numbly and left the reception with her parents, and they Apparated with her back to her house. She then went and laid upon her bed, the picture of her Cedric's dead body burning behind her eyelids. The funeral today had been as heartbreaking and as agonizing as she'd thought it would be, and as she tried to drift off to sleep, the same thought lingered in her mind: Cedric, you were my one and only, and I'll never love again.


End file.
